I have been rubbish at writing on my blog.
I know that. I try to be better, and I have made countless resolves to publish more regularly, with varying and temporary degrees of success. But enough is enough. I have tried to figure out what’s stopping me and through all the self doubt, the anxiety over if people will like my posts, the writer’s block, and the 10 million other things I’m trying to juggle in ‘adulting’ I’ve realised one thing is playing a major role.
The idea of perfection often stops me from actually blogging.
I think of an idea, then think about it some more, then try to write it. This is usually where I have a panic about it not being ‘good enough’ which spirals out into spending hours thinking about how to make it perfect, and then ending up doing something else as it’s late or I have to be somewhere. Then days (or even weeks) later I finally get around to writing the post, or worse still it sits unfinished in my drafts forever. The thing is, I know that I’m a good writer (most of the time…) and that I am capable of writing decent content. The thing that gets to me is the idea of having to be ‘amazing’ and then psyching myself out as I don’t think I can live up to those impossible expectations. And it’s true.
I can’t be perfect, because there’s no such thing.
I read so many posts about ‘the things you MUST include in every blog post’ and ‘how to create a great blog post’ that I often get overwhelmed with trying to cram it all in and live up to fictitious ideas of what a blog should be. The truth is that blogs are for anyone, blogs are for everyone. If I want to include 50 pictures in a post, or none, that’s ok. If I don’t use all the right hashtags, or forget to include alt tags for my images (I still don’t fully know what they are, can anyone enlighten me!?) it’s ok. The world will keep turning, the blogoshpere will keep going, and I can keep blogging. The only thing stopping me from writing a post a certain way is me. Today I say not any more.
I’m tired of getting in my own way all the time.
I’m tired of talking myself out of things I’m passionate about, because they’re also a bit scary. I’m fed up of having dreams and goals and plans live only in notebooks, never to see the light of day. Today I am standing up and saying enough! I refuse to live my life like that any more. By shutting myself down when I have an idea I’m just limiting my own dreams – and who wants to do that?
I’ve realised that a lot of it is also down to not being totally honest with myself, or you my readers.
There are days when I’m struggling. When I can only elicit a jumble of words that almost resemble a sentence from my brain. When I just want to curl up in a ball under my duvet and not have to deal with the world. And on those days I put off blogging, because I feel less than perfect. Even though I know blogging helps, and that putting my thoughts down into words helps me get rid of the mess in my mind, just a little. So I go forward without fear of writing those struggles down, and with the intention to document truly what my journey to better mental well-being actually looks like. That was the original point of this blog, and I’ve get a little lost somewhere along the way. So let’s get back to the way things were.
Today is a blank page. I don’t know where it will take me. Today is where my book begins, and the rest really is unwritten right now. But I promise to write it down along the way.
Do you fear not being perfect? What do you do to overcome that? Let me know in the comments below ❤
Have a great day wherever you are,